Filling up the tank

It's been a while since i've been on and thrown out a blog worth reading so here is another attempt; hope it works out.
So lately life has been kinda ridiculous. It's just been one of those seasons. I'm not in the zone. So i'm kinda working out how to figure this all out with that being said. I remember when Paul talked at realife about having your train of fact driven by thought with emotion following. It's making more sense everytime this runs around. So whenever you don't feel like you have that emotional connection going with the Big Man it doesn't mean he's deserted you. It's actually an opportunity to prove our allegiance if you will. Although, that is not really the right terminology. cuz whenever we're not on that mountain top and we feel like we're screwing up more and more, we're not really thinking that we are as close to him as we usually are. but we keep coming back cuz of Christs redeeming love. we can't always explain it, but he's always welcoming us back. and that's one thing that i think growing up in our generation has done to us negatively. we have our mission trips and our church camps and our DNOWs and are retreats for this and that. But what do we have inbetween? nada. So whenever we experience that "spiritual high" at camp or on a retreat and we return back to the real world, we're bound to come back to reality sooner or later. and with these events set up like they are i feel we kinda live from event to event sometime and we depend on that particular speaker and that particular worship section to fill us up for the rest of the year or however long we need. we kinda treat our spiritual life like a car, we stop every once in a while and fill up but we end up pushing it to the next stop don't we? i mean really, if we're honest when we reach that valley in our walk we are pushing our car of spirituality, and it is only when we see that gas station looming on that horizon that we begin to try and get the car up and running again. but spirituality is not a car, so we shouldn't treat it like one.
when we get to the valley, not if but when, we have to be prepared to get out of it. and we can't do it, thats the key right there. we have to turn everything that we've been holding onto to God and let him get us out of our mess.
so thats kinda what i'm trying to teach myself again right now. i'm in a rut and only Christ can save me, so i'm turning it all over to him. sure my quiet times and such won't jump up exponentially, but a slow climb will get me out of the valley and back onto steady ground, and God can take it from there too.
hope this made sense
-matt